A few days ago I published a “no excuses” post deliberately not explaining my nearly month long silence on EmilyintheGlass. With a little further reflection, however, I’ve decided that, while excuses are still unnecessary, perhaps a little anecdote would be appropriate.
Let me also say that I struggled to decide how to approach the revelation of recent personal events on my blog. First approach: sidestep mention of it entirely (which is what I’ve been doing, as you’ll soon note). I thought about the oft-overstepped line that should be drawn between a blogger’s personal life and her written life. I considered the magic of keeping certain secrets to myself. I resolutely replied to all who inquired, “I don’t think this news has a place on my blog.”
And then I started to envision the readers of this blog, sometime in the future, learning through hints or phrases or pictures or titles that something major had changed and knowing that I, the writer, the storyteller, had kept it from them — intentionally, in the name of discretion.
At the risk of sounding too dramatic, I would use the word “betrayed” to describe the way I’d feel if I learned that one of the writers I follow so faithfully had kept something so principal from me, the reader.
I think I stumbled upon one of the major dilemmas and major joys in a writer’s life. It is the question of transparency. A writer must not hold back, but bare her soul: wisely, artistically; but honestly nonetheless.
And so, to all of you who have not yet shared in my utter and complete joy, I’d like to announce that Nicolas and I are engaged!
A month ago I didn’t know what to write. For days I didn’t even visit my own blog. Perhaps I felt silenced by my secret. Now I know that such a pertinent bit of news cannot be kept from this platform, quite simply because it will animate so much of what I write in the coming days, weeks, months…
Voila. Not an excuse, but maybe a bit of a better explanation. Hooray!
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